This is part 3 of the 5 part series on affirmations. Check out the other parts of the series here: Part 1 and Part 2.

How often do you focus on what your partner is not doing for you, their flaws, or what’s missing in your relationship? Maybe you think about what they owe you and feel resentment, or even anger.

This mindset is unhealthy for a relationship. However, it is common and natural. Therefore, we have to actively work against it. The good news is you can work against it. You can change your mindset and therefore, create a healthier, happier relationship with the most important person in your life.

Affirmations can be used to shape your mindset around your relationship and counter the negative thoughts that have become default for you in your relationship.

Here are the steps we will take to combat these negative mindsets and create an environment of love and compassion once again.

• Identify your negative thought pattern.
  • Mindfulness is where change of any kind starts. You can do some journalling now by reflecting on the negative thoughts that come up when you think about your relationship or partner. Or, you could write them down when they come up for you throughout your daily life. Just focus on bringing your awareness to what your thoughts actually are, you might be surprised with what comes up.
• Stop the negative thought.
  • Once you are aware of the exact negative thoughts you possess you can start catching yourself thinking them, and extinguish the negative behavior. You could do this by saying “No” to yourself as soon as you catch yourself thinking or saying negative things about your partner. Or, you could wear a rubberband around your wrist and give yourself a small snap every time you catch yourself in this thought process.
• Replace the negative thought with a positive affirmation.
  • Shape these thoughts into positive alternatives. Make sure you do this step by step over time, without using an affirmation that feels like a lie. Maybe you start with an affirmation about how you love your partner. Whatever affirmation feels right and true to you, start saying that after stopping the negative thoughts.

Use these simple steps to start changing your mindset over your partner and create a healthy relationship. I want to hear how this works for you in the comments below. Let me know how you are going to use these strategies in your relationship.

If you are ready to create a habit of affirmations in your life, then grab your free copy of the 7 day affirmation journal.